What would make you feel embarrassed in public?

Question number two on the reconnect with yourself experiment.

What would make you feel embarrassed in public?

My goodness. This is a blog not a novella.

I think the biggest thing is probably being made to look stupid. That seems redundant though...hmmm. Lemme think...I guess something that really embarrasses me is when I am reactionary. I used to do that a lot. Fly off the handle and become chaos theory personified. Thankfully there is medicine for that.

Anyway, 99% of the time, I would regret it. And would write it off as the fact that I am "passionate". I am passionate. But reactionary was something I had to learn to make distinctions about and learn that people were causing me to be reactionary and causes were why I was passionate.

I am sure my days of "showing out" in public are not done and I am sure that I will do worse things to embarrass myself...like falling "up" stairs...not that I've done that or anything. Well, you can't prove it.

Question # 1

If you missed the story behind these questions you can find it here


1. What is that thing that no one, not even your partner, your mother or your best friend, knows about you?


 Boy. they know how to start this off, don't they...I am pretty much an open book. But there are a few things that any of those people don't know about me but if I had to pick one, I would say that I wish I would have the chance, just once to meet my sperm donor. I would have liked to have seen if we had matching freckles and did he love the taste of beer. Did he suffer from mental illness? Did I get all my bad habits from him?

I don't think I have ever told anyone this because you shouldn't want to meet the douche that abandoned you when you were in utero.  You are supposed to hate him on principle. Trust me, I do.

But I'd like to have someone to blame for my inability to tan,

Cook.Write. Change.

I have been looking for a way to get inspired since my break up. Yeah, I know I haven't written about it and frankly I don't think I am ready to write about it right now. But like most people, after a crappy break up, you start to wonder what the hell is wrong with you. I decided that I needed to go on my own personal journey...my own eat, pray, love so to speak...only mine is called Cook, Write, Change. I have always loved to cook and really use it as a way to express my love for people. What am I going to cook? I don't know. With countless cookbooks, I am sure I can find something. And it has to be a recipe it can't be something I just whip up. That is too easy for me. Way too easy. I need to learn the patience and gratification of following a recipe. That sometimes it is perfect exactly as it is. I plan to document my cooking here on the blog with recipes, pics and video if possible.

Ok, so that takes care of Cook...now what about write? Well, I write two columns a month, I am a student. I blog AND I journal. A lot of writing. But, how can I really challenge myself? I found it  here.

 These 62 questions I will answer on my blog. Even the super personal ones. No holding back. I am not sure how often I will answer them, but this will certainly be a challenge.

Now we are onto Change. Change what? I want to change everything. The world. Myself. My community. My hair. Whatever it is, I want change. Why? Because the fear of change stifles. It is the worst kind of drug. And frankly, I have been mainlining it for years.