The reinvention of Amy is going as planned. Sorta. I am back on my medicine which means in a few days I will have way less anxiety and way more focus. Both of which are good things.
The whole training for the 5K thing has taken a backseat for a few reasons. One, the unbearable heat as of late and my unbearable laziness.
The one thing I hate about being on medicine is that I pride myself on being witty and creative and I feel like that gets compromised on medicine. Sure I will be able to start a blog and finish it but will be worth reading? Will it be funny and informative?
I know that these fears seem silly and like someone who just doesn't want to take her medicine. Well that is true, I do not want to take my medicine. But I know I need to or I won't be here to worry about creativity.
I am an idea person. It is why people come to me for marketing. I am just worried that the well of ideas that is my brain is starting to dry up. Then what will I have?
I have been walking around like a total bitch since I started medicine. Resenting everyone and resenting needing medicine.
But the truth is, when no one is looking, I find myself smiling. A LOT.
your struggle with meds really mirrors mine. i care. i'm glad you're doing better.
ReplyDeleteDamn, girl. Could I get one of those smiles? =)
ReplyDeletePardon me for saying this, but if the meds give you "way more focus", don't you think that you'll be able to focus on creativity even more? Of my friends and acquaintances, you have one of the most creative minds. I don't think there is a medication on the planet that could squelch your creativity. I, honestly, wouldn't give it a second thought. You're going to be fine. Hell, you're going to be better than fine.
Love you!!